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Ollie Cromwell's crowning dilemma. Illustration by Kulsoom Mirza

Jubilee Rhymes

Cavaliers and Roundheads

Ollie Cromwell, aged just three
Just loved the Diamond Jubilee,
He’d wear a saucepan for a crown,
But soon it stuck there, upside down.

His Mother tugged, the boy turned pale,
Her efforts were to no avail,
The problem was, his Mother said,
That Ollie had such a round head.

After Harry Graham’s Ruthless Rhymes

Pop goes Henry. Illustration by Amrita Dasgupta

Jubilee Rhymes

Henry’s party in the street,
Would be a lovely royal treat,
To celebrate the Jubilee,
With flags and music, games and tea.
The food was good, he could not stop,
He ate until he went off pop,
From looking much like Henry Eight,
He ended up just Henry. Late.

After Harry Graham’s Ruthless Rhymes

Republican bunting at La Maison des Roses, Webbs Road, London SW

Jubilee Rhymes

Royalist vs Republican

A royalist simply through and through,
Fred turned his house red, white and blue.
It really was a sight to see,
All dressed up for the Jubilee.
But Mabel (maybe with good reason)
Showed inclinations close to treason.
Then with an axe found in the garden,
Fred refused to grant her pardon.
He smiled and said ‘Off with her head,
I’ll buy a corgi pup instead.’

After Harry Graham’s Ruthless Rhymes

La Dream 2

The Winning Ruthless Rhyme

George’s New Year’s Resolution

New Year, he thought, was just the chance
To buy a little place in France.
When Mavis once again said no,
George knew that she would have to go.

His beating heart was all a-quiver,
As George pushed Mavis in the river.
And as she floated down the stream,
George shrugged and muttered, ‘Vive la dream’.

After Harry Graham’s Ruthless Rhymes

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